Money

"Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have." -Hebrews 13:5

Money is not one issue in a marriage.  It is THE issue in a marriage.  Common: "What's hers is hers and what's yours is hers."  We don't live like that, but money is still an issue.  It's complicated for me because before I was with Tyler, I was rolling in money.  I could get anything I wanted, whenever I wanted.  I had nothing I necessarily wanted, but I had money to blow if I wanted to.  From what I get of the story, I think he was the same way too, way before me.  But neither of us have anything to show for.  Tyler handles it a lot better than I do because he has hit rock bottom before.  I have always had someone there to back me up if something happened.  But I do need to realize that I have a roof over my head, food on the table, a nice car to drive, a job, and a bed to sleep in.  Electricity and running water.  I need to be grateful for what I have.  Luxuries and necessities are on two different ends of the line.  I do get upset about when he might spend the remainder of his money on something I think is stupid.  But, he earned that money.  Just like I do mine.  We just have a lot of bills to pay off.  Some from his past, others that we've racked up together.  A lot of unplanned things have happened ever since August, and I feel obligated to save my money in case something happens and we need money.  Call me a pessimist but that's how I am.  I feel guilty spending my money on something I "just want."  Sometimes saving money is a problem, but sometimes not.  Unfortunately, money is a necessity.  It's such a small physical thing, to create such a big thing.  They say money doesn't buy happiness.  I agree, but disagree.  For instance, I gave up a scholarship because I wasn't happy in the place I was.  The money couldn't keep me there.  It wasn't worth the stress.  But on the other hand, if you don't have the extra money to enjoy yourself, it can be stressful.  Tyler had spent a lot of money in a short period of time; enjoyed it at the moment, but doesn't have but one thing to show for it now.

A couple weeks ago, I exceeded my 24 hour spending limit because I paid all of our bills early.  Most people would freak about that.  But, I knew everything be okay.  I had a relief come over me because it was out of the way and we didn't have to think about them til the next month.  We're more broke now that we've been in the past 10 months.  We're preparing for a wedding in 6 weeks and money is going to be very tight.  But we have everything we need.  But God is watching over us and is blessing us with the NEEDS and giving us some patience for the WANTS!! lol